Perhaps my subscription to RealSimple is finally rubbing off on me. Perhaps it's the alluring home-organization/consumerism wet dream that is The Container Store. Perhaps it's just me finally recoiling from the chaos that occurs when two unmedicated people with ADD combine years' worth of both their junk in a hasty and disorganized manner.

Yes, gentle reader, for years I've thumbed through pages featuring neatly-organized California Closets brimful of matching cedar hangers, tidy canvas shoe cubbies and meticulously stacked and labelled baskets, only to promptly throw yet more shoes on the floor of my own closet, in which mismatched hangers languish, empty and tangled (and often broken), as clothes pile higher still on the floor.

I realize that previous attempts to change my messy ways have been fruitless. My makeup organizer leaps to mind. It is a Lucite marvel with slots for lipsticks, a bin for brushes, and compartments for sundry eye and cheek colors. It is in my drawer and full of makeup, but the lipsticks rattle around in the skin-care compartment and the brush section is now occupied by an assortment of roller eyeshadow, lipliners, concealer, and occasionally a nail clipper. (What can I say, even when there's a place for everything, I never put anything back in its place!)

Then there is my craft box. Imagine my nifty makeup organizer, but bigger and with craft projects. Then imagine all those projects' materials thrown willy-nilly into any compartment, with vows to organize them all very meticulously, but "later."

But this time, I promise to do better. All of my shoes really will go on the shoe rack instead of in its general direction. My valuables really will be stowed in attractive, matching boxes rather than underneath 20 pairs of jeans on top of my dresser. And my tops really will go back on the hangers after my daily ritual of getting dressed in seven different outfits before discarding them for a favorite shirt rescued from the depths of the hamper.

Sure, I have been bad before. But this time, I will be really, really good. I promise. My house will be organized from top to bottom and it will stay that way! Either that, or the mummified remains of my family will be found 15 years hence, buried beneath a mountain of recyclables and out-of-season clothes.

As do so many tragedies, it starts off so innocently. But somehow, one pizza box on the kitchen counter manages to call all his little friends over for a party and within two days, there is cardboard to the ceiling. And after months of "organizing" by way of throwing stuff in Rubbermaid bins and shoving it in the storage room, one day you go down to find that box of "Baby clothes -- 9 months and up" and realize that not only are there approximately 43 million boxes in that room, but that none of them are labeled.

Now you are trapped in a filthy house with a naked baby and 800 back issues of RealSimple.

That is when you know it is time to visit The Container Store, my friends. Because nothing helps bust clutter like buying more things!!